Millions of Roman Catholics, and their attorneys breathed a sigh of relief as news of the demise of the Supreme Being was releases by both NASA,and the Chinese Space Agencies. Floating in orbit about Mars the remains of what many believe to be the "Big Guy" is to be retrieved for examination.
Calculations estimate that although this entity is thought to be you know who he's actually rather petite. Measuring in height no more than four foot eleven. That, and apparently wearing female makeup. News that the Lord of Hosts is not only dead,...and short, but a suspected transvestite, and possibly Homosexual has commentators abuzz with speculation.
Besides the Lord of Lords floating in Mars orbit the Hubble Telescope also found what seems to be the mortal remains of Godzilla, King Kong, The Creature from the Black Lagoon, and Snow White.
The reality of these characters thought till now to be works of fiction have thrown a rather large subjective monkey wrench into what philosophers had thought was reality.
We should expect a number of sweaty confused, and incoherent press conferences, and documentaries by theologians comix book artists politicians science fiction writers, and assorted nuts with guns, and whiskey.
A follow up on our 'Bulletin' above! With the passing of the Lord of Hosts in the orbit of Mars a general call has been put out by a Synod of all the major, and whack job religions of the world.
A casting call to the multitudes for the job of Supreme Being.
On the retrieval, and careful examination of the previous Gawd it was found the he was just some guy. No holy whizbangs whatever.
He apparently was Hatfield Broadjump a former plumper for the Kansas City Department of Mental Hygene. He went missing on his lunch break in 1932, and it seems had been Gawd ever since.
Btw his death along with the deaths of the others found in Mars orbit remains a mystery.
Seems a contract was found in the back pocket of his liquid metal robes detailing the job, and how it's gained, and passed on. According to this document this has been going on forever. Our Gawds are just regular folks chosen at random to care take this end of creation.
Apparently there are other Gawds all over the universe doing the same thing for their patch. As for if there's a Boss of Bosses somewhere we don't know. Which sort of puts us right back where we started in this whole religion gawd thing.
Anyway once the sucker is chosen, and the contract signed,...eh with just a pen. None of that signed in blood stuff for this gig. All that noise is set aside for the 'other' position. Ahem.
Once the mark is signed sealed, and delivered he gets all the powers, and hard times all gawds have to put up with. As the contract sez, "...Chose Carefully.
A casting call to the multitudes for the job of Supreme Being.
On the retrieval, and careful examination of the previous Gawd it was found the he was just some guy. No holy whizbangs whatever.
He apparently was Hatfield Broadjump a former plumper for the Kansas City Department of Mental Hygene. He went missing on his lunch break in 1932, and it seems had been Gawd ever since.
Btw his death along with the deaths of the others found in Mars orbit remains a mystery.
Seems a contract was found in the back pocket of his liquid metal robes detailing the job, and how it's gained, and passed on. According to this document this has been going on forever. Our Gawds are just regular folks chosen at random to care take this end of creation.
Apparently there are other Gawds all over the universe doing the same thing for their patch. As for if there's a Boss of Bosses somewhere we don't know. Which sort of puts us right back where we started in this whole religion gawd thing.
Anyway once the sucker is chosen, and the contract signed,...eh with just a pen. None of that signed in blood stuff for this gig. All that noise is set aside for the 'other' position. Ahem.
Once the mark is signed sealed, and delivered he gets all the powers, and hard times all gawds have to put up with. As the contract sez, "...Chose Carefully.
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